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Most Annoying Habits of Coworkers
Rico
 
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Just call me Maestro. I like to crank up my classical music n leave my office door open. What's more is I have 4 favorite songs which I play on loop. Not sure how my colleagues feel about it. I mean they do regularly ask me to turn it down so they can concentrate. But I think they're just kidding so I'll just go ahead n crank it back up in a few hours. Oh n if you see me walking by w/ papers folded under my arm, that's me heading to the toilet to take a huge dump that I won%u2019t properly flush

Want to Scream BACK THE F OFF
 
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You: "This is off, why did you allocate this incorrectly?"
Me: "I was off that day, you were covering for me"
You: "Oh we need to be more careful"

NO, Ms. Perfect, YOU! And stop saying: Does it make sense to do (idea proposed by me) instead of (idea proposed by you) - YES it does make fucking sense, get your head out of your control freak, micro-managing ass!

AssHat
 
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I pray you don't get any down-time, I know it'll spell you thinking of ways to "improve" operations...and by improve I mean make useless changes to an efficient process simply because you are a control freak who needs to get involved w/ everything. Oh look, another attempt to brown-nose/show-off masked as a BS report no one gives 2 fucks about. And you're just so damn enthusiastic over your efforts! No it's not exciting, it's another one of your useless changes, stop clapping! (yes she claps)

AssHat
 
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You're a nice guy and all..but when you eat like that, with all that open-mouthed smacking, chewing like a damn cow - well I just kind of want to punch you in the face

JeromeIamNot
 
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You: *hand me over 1 half-assed sloppy report*
Me: "Don't you have like 5 more reports for me to review? Others are starting to complain."
You: "You should be lucky I did one at all!"
Me: "Oh I forgot you're paid for your delightful presence. Any actual work is a special treat"

JeromeIamNot
 
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You just love your uncovered louda$$ sneezes don't you? I cringe thinking about your keyboard/monitor/anything else that is subjet to your daily spraying

JeromeIamNot
 
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"Hey mommy, can you put daddy on the phone"...you are a grown man well in your 30s - why have I heard this yet again

superanooyed
 
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Stop trying to impress everyone in the office & stop trying to get some attention with your loud ass phone calls on your mobile talking about football season tickets, tailgating & all the other stuff you want us to hear. Be courteous & TAKE THE DAMN CALL OUTSIDE OF THE OFFICE! WE DON'T CARE ABOUT YOU & your stupid life! You're disruptive! We have a life of our own! Your behavior reminds me of a teenage girl. Be a man! Stop being a little bitch or are you really a female in a mans body! GO AWAY!

Chip Junkie
 
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Please stop daily comparisons between the west coast and east coast. It reminds me of the hip hop wars of the 90s.

Chip Junkie
 
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Please don't stop me on my way to the bathroom to tell me you decided against Chinese for lunch because it makes you bloated. We don't have lunch plans together, so why do I care.

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